Monday, July 28, 2014

Git'r Done

Greetings and Salutations,
     Well, I am finally ready to really dust off my white board (I have one set up in my den in a spot I see every day) and get some stuff done! I really don't have to dust it off. Since I moved in April alot has been accomplished but lately, I've been in a stall pattern. It's time to list things on the board in a way that greatly increases the speed in which they get done. As in git'r done! I have to make my goals SMART.
     I'm still a bit overwhelmed with the laundry list of things to do in my journey to make San Francisco my home. Things still don't feel secure and real. Its getting better and of course it hasn't been long since I moved out here. I have well established patience with my personal life is a work in progress at best.
    SMART goals (Specific-Measurable-Attainable-Relevant-Time based) really do help if you have never tried them before. For me I think I need to amend this to SMART ASS goals (Specific-Measurable-Attainable-Relevant-Time based-And-Short n' Sweet) LOL.
    One of my biggest problems is that I make too many goals. This is just as problematic as not making any at all. Lately this has really caused grid lock with attaining success. It is adding to my overwhelmed state of mind because nothing is getting crossed off the list.
     So damnit I'm rolling up my sleeves and digging in. Its time to get a few monkey's off my back. With this in mind and the next two days off here is the game plan:

Tuesday 7/29/2014
(1) SLEEP IN (for the love of all that is sacred I am not getting up before 0900!)
(2)  Have secured parking place in The City by 12pm
(3) Go to paint store and decide once and for all on paint colors for apartment (3) and purchase bedroom color
After/If I do the above then The "B" List
(4) Prime bedroom walls
(5) Laundry

Wednesday 7/30/2014
(1) DMV: obtain California Driver's Licence and register truck and get tags (this has been the entire zoo on my back)
(2) Paint Bedroom
(3) Clean apartment
(4) Call and check on new health insurance to see if I got accepted yet (premium is due 7/31 for current ins)
(5) Move truck to her new home (parking space 3 blocks away)
After/If I do the above The "B" list
(4) any stragglers from Tuesday--if all done- RELAX and be sure to mark it down as a mental personal win for a successful 2 days and less monkeys in my personal zoo!

     I think this will be a great start to getting some things off my list (aka my mind) and build some momentum that I have lost along the way. This list has been plaguing me for almost 2 months. I'm sick of the weight on my back. Its time to stop sitting around and get back to the path I was on before I left Charleston.
     I want to be on that path again. It was just starting to get good. It was just staring to feel like a life I really wanted. Pottery classes, sewing lessons, jewelry making classes, biking, swimming, and blogging regularly. These are the things I must do to get myself back on track. I just need to break it down in more bite size pieces. Something more than work, sleep, couch, anxiety--repeat.

Tootles :)
Heather

Monday, July 7, 2014

Are You Going....To...San Francisco....

Greetings and Salutations from the West,
--This isn't my usual format for this blog. It is usually goal/task oriented. I'll get back to that. Today (7/01), this is what came out when I sat down. I made a conscious decision not stifle these thoughts. I have lots goals/tasks to do and funny stories of a life in the day of living in San Francisco. Those are to come. I hope this is a bridge to bring you from where I was to where I am. Oh what a difference 3,000 miles and the second most densely populated major city in the US can make!

     Hi. I know I know. I've been a bad girl not blogging but for what it is worth, I have been a busy girl trying to get integrated into my new life and that has taken a hot minute! Writing has been on my mind every day because let me tell you one thing--There are about a million things to blog about out here in the b-e-a-utiful  and crazy city of San Francisco and all that it entails. I keep saying tomorrow, tomorrow. I'll write tomorrow. Again I am reminded that lesson #1-- Start from where you are and work from there.
     So I will start from where I am and see what else comes out. I'm in San Francisco. I lived here before, I think 2008 was the last time in the City. I have lots of experience out here. And I say that to say big deal and WOW. How different things look when you are here to live and not just vacation on a travel assignment!
     I will be quick to admit that I thought this major move was gonna be a S-N-A-P. What crack was I smoking? (and BTW I don't smoke crack--its whack LOL) But I can also say thank goodness I didn't know how much I would struggle in the beginning because to change my mind, still at this moment not knowing how it will all work out, would be a life experience wasted.
     Each day I am feeling better and better. I am slowly creating a life out here for myself. I think this move has brought up alot of grief issues with my mom. I can't tell her about the crazy ass things I see out here. I can't hear her say "Heather get you butt back to Charleston where you belong" LOL and then tell me how much she supports me and my decisions.
     Most of all I can't hear her say how proud of me she is and my tenacity to follow my dreams no matter how isolated, scared, and unsure I am. That she loves me and believes in me. Never underestimate the power of those words "I'm proud of you" and tell them to your kids OFTEN. Tell your loved ones and friends. It does amazing things mentally. But especially from a parent. It can't be replaced when lost.
     Basically everything I own is still back in Charleston in a POD. I want to get things flowing out here (money) and get rid of some debt before I tackle that part of the journey. And let me tell you this is a journey. I have been happy and excited. I have had Zen moments. I have also cried a ton. I have been depressed enough to not leave my apartment for days. And I have waited patiently (not really but it sounds good LOL) for the tides to change and for me to feel better.
     The tides are changing and I feel better. And it is building. Its headed in a great direction as it has been, but I am beginning to trust it. Trust my dreams. Trust in myself on a deeper level. Trust the journey. There are still lots of unknowns, but I am tackling each one to the best of my ability.
     About 2 weeks ago I worked myself up into such a lather (not of all my own doing-- I had an outside contribution) I basically white-knuckled it to the point of giving myself the vapors. The next day, when I came to my senses (and sobered up) I heard one word control. and then I understood--let go. I believe that this is the lesson I'm supposed to learn thus far where I am at this stressful and transitional time in my life.
     What can I control? Me and my response to the situation at hand. Take the "List" and choose what I can do in THAT moment even if I should be doing something else. Try to my best ability to do what needs to be done, resolve it, and move on. Recognize the victories, not just the failures. Let it happen before I react as if it  (what ever "it" is) has already happened. Most of what we fear may happen doesn't. I know this, buts it difficult to live by every day. And if I can't get it done. If my stress level is too high, wait it out. Be on the look out for the moment the opportunity comes I can get back on track. That moment when I can catch my breath.
     And come back it will. Its the best part of life. Wait it out, work hard, show up, and don't give up. It will come around. You just have to be ready, open, and on the lookout for it to happen.

Tootles :)
Heather

Saturday, April 26, 2014

I Love The Craziness Of This Place

Greetings and Salutations,
     This is a real ad I came across last night surfing Craig's List out here. Seriously. I nearly peed myself laughing. He is asking $100/month for 10 sq ft! While this is nuts and cakes, it is one of the many things I love about being here. That something this crazy doesn't make me reject the difference between he and I. 
     We are all different outwardly expressed or not. While I don't get this guy's brain (thank goodness btw), there is enough room for us all on this planet. I can appreciate what I don't understand and it doesn't offend me or make me uncomfortable. Because it doesn't effect me personally.
     The biggest take away I get from this is that he has procreated. Someone either lives with this guy or at the very least had sex with him. When I look into the mirror, and think about this ad, questions arise as to why I am still single and he isn't LOL. Have a great day and hope you atleast get a giggle out of this!

Tootles :)
Heather

For Rent: The space under my sink 

I am renting the space underneath my kitchen sink. I will of course empty out the area and have included a photo with my stuff still stored there only to give a better idea of its capacity. It is clean, dark, odor free and relatively dry. I will allow you access to my kitchen M-F from 6:00 pm until 9:00 pm PST so that you can get at your storage area without issue. I do ask that you do not store any animal, vegetable, mineral or sprits that are either alive or dead or dying. In addition I also ask that nothing explosive, flammable, caustic, products from protected or endangered species, weapons, Nazi memorabilia or Michael Jackson albums be stores in this area. I will not be held responsible if your storage area is compromised by my toddler or the teenage boy next door looking for old Playboy magazines as it is not a secure cabinet in any true meaning of the word. You may be able to get some sort of rider on your Homeowners insurance or bond to cover your belongings in the unfortunate event of their demise. Also, if my sink breaks and the storage area floods or food debris from my garbage disposal fills it inadvertently, I will contact you immediately so that you can remove all of your material from under my sink. You will of course be responsible for not only cleaning up the area but also for all repairs. 

Sunday, April 13, 2014

Onto My Next "To Do" List---Employment

Greetings and Salutations,
     Well, it has been a week today and I am hard at work trying to get work. I staid out of the car for four days (driving atlease!) The move was well, a move and it is still in motion since I have not landed in my own place. I am grateful that my friend and her family have taken me in until I can get on my feet. (MAJOR understatement)
     I didn't get everything done back home before I left like I wanted but in the end, it all worked out. I was damn close and did a great job coordinating all that I did for this move solo. I had some help to tie up the loose ends and some things had to be left behind no matter how painful it was to do it. I was in serious jeopardy of dragging that on way longer than was healthy. It was time to go. Overall I can add several things to the "experience" column in life fosho!
     On Tuesday I applied for 2 per diem jobs (no hours promised, first to get called off, and first to go home early) in places I would love to work and would hope to keep even when I get full time at a hospital. I also applied for 2 different hospitals 4 different shifts. Tuesday was a busy application day for sure.
     I heard back from the 2 per diem jobs and should know more Monday. It is looking great (spoke on the phone Friday and going for site visit/meet staff Monday) for one and promising for the other (haven't spoken directly with that one yet). Plan to follow up Tuesday with both hospitals. Have another paper application to fill out and send in Monday for another Surgery Center.
     I am going to spend the next weeks getting adjusted to the traffic patterns and culture shock that is California even when "your in the know". Things are just "different" out here more so than most places I think. It isn't meant to sound or be negative, but just "different" and if you want to make it successfully out here, adjustment just takes time and you have to open your mind and ride the wave. That takes an extraordinary amount of energy and willingness.
     I am here and so very happy to be. I look forward to getting the necessary steps completed to get settled ASAP and it will be a challenge to keep my mind in the here and now. I am anxious to feel "moved in". So far I would give myself a "B". Breathe. Slow and Steady wins the race. This is my mantra for the next 4-6 weeks. Picture a turtle. BE the turtle. That is unless you are driving around here. In that case you wanna be the Hare, because in THAT race, the damn turtle got ran over in the right lane on the 101.

Tootles :)
Heather

Sunday, March 23, 2014

The POD Is Packed And Ready

Greetings and Salutations,
     I was one week off from my packing goal. Not too bad I think! Friday I was completely packed except 2 boxes (that I finished today) and a few loose items. I took the weekend off and had some fun. I still have taxes and a few other loose ends to wrap up. And yes-- I still need to wash the damn truck!
     Left to clean (other than baseboards and floors): 6 blinds, 6 windows inside/out, 6 windows just outside, and fridge. Fix-it man Tuesday for final repairs etc. Cleaning lady coming Tuesday to discuss future fees. She will complete my team I need to be a landlord. I have a fix-it man, painter, yard maintenance man, property manager, and cleaning person. Sweet.
     All the ceilings got painted. They look fantastic. Well worth the expense now. It was the first time in my life I have ever paid someone to paint. Mom and I always did that! I still have to take down the border and paint the dining room. I still feel a mixture of dread and openness to the experience.
     There is a Carolina Wren making a nest in the potted ivy on the front porch. It has been fun watching her go back and forth with the building materials. She is diligent and working very hard. I will leave that plant behind so she can have her babies.
     I have several bird families that have adopted me and come to my front porch every spring to nest. It can get quit loud out there! They also use the Boston Ferns but I don't have any hanging (yes I am considering buying some LOL). I will miss my little birdies. I sure hope a family (s) of birds finds me to adopt in San Francisco.
     Everything I wanted to take fit into the POD like a glove. It was amazing. I am proud of my mad packing skills. 10 years of travel nursing will do that for you I guess. So far the potential casualties are an office chair and the mirror for my dresser. I am thinking I will have room in truck but we will see. It isn't over until it is over LOL.
     I am on my final approach for time left in Charleston. I am equal parts happy and sad to leave. I think when I drive out of town I will be tearful. I will deeply miss all of my great friends. I think when I get onto I-10 in Jacksonville, Florida excitement will settle in. California will be straight ahead of me, give or take a few thousand miles :)
     It will take me back to 14 years ago in January 2000. Jacksonville was the beginning point of travel for my first assignment in Los Angeles. I find myself this time headed out to make California my new home. Instead of parts unknown, it will be parts well traveled and ready to make a new life for myself.
     I (almost) never dream about strangers. When I do I can't see their faces. I usually dream about people I know. Last night I dreamt I was buying a house with my husband/boyfriend. I was excited and happy in the dream that we were deciding on which one to choose and laughing together. Funny, I never saw his face.

Tootles :)
Heather

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Hanging in at 95% Done

Greetings and Salutations,
     I have been hanging in at 95% done since Friday and I am OK with that. Didn't loose my sanity after all. Some times I guess it is learning to accept that no matter how hard you try to make things happen in your time frame it isn't always gonna work out that way. I think my expectation of having everything 100% done was unrealistic seeming that I am still 2 weeks away from leaving. Adaptation is a valuable skill to acquire.
     Since several ceilings needed repainting (its been 11 years) I thought it best to keep them on the same schedule and repaint them all . Painter starts tomorrow. I have my repair man hard at work on my list of things to get done around the house (install 1 fan, replace 2 others, replace some outlets, address the dryer vent for lint and fire safety, etc). He comes back Friday to finish off list.
     Only thing left in the kitchen is last minute stuff and I need to deal with the food. Guest bedroom furniture is going to a new home on Wednesday. Still have a few things to pack up in my bedroom. I still need to decide on rental dwelling insurance.
     I am 2 weeks away from bon voyage Charleston! It is getting scary again. It is getting real again. Its funny how you can focus so much on the task at hand (packing) you forget what happens when you are all done (leaving)!
"To Do" List
(1) Taking truck in tomorrow for repairs
(2) Wally World to get few things needed
(3) The dreaded grocery store
(4) Make few calls to help insure informed decision of best rental dwelling policy to chose
     I have been working on list of things that need to be done before I can leave (automate some payments, get Murphy's nails clipped, take pictures of house in move out condition, etc). There isn't too much left on the list.
     I still have friends to see and some more of Charleston to love and enjoy before I shove off. I'm gonna miss this place, but in my heart I feel one day I will return. For now, it is my season for adventure, finding my destiny, and self discovery of who I am for the second half of my life. I am in love with the possibility of all the possibilities.

Tootles :)
Heather

Thursday, March 13, 2014

Day # 2 Days Left Til I Better Be Done With Moving Process

Greetings and Salutations,
     Those of you that know me, know I have the patience of Job. I have to say if I am not done by Friday I am seriously gonna lose what is left of my sanity (don't say it!! LOL). I am O-V-E-R the process but alas, I still have more SHIT to pack. &^%#&*((&^$$*.
     OK I think I feel alittle better LOL. I live by "slow and steady wins the race" but damn. Stick a fork in me, I'm just about done. Tuesday I really rocked it. I totally finished the shed! Sorting, throwing away/letting go of, packing and cleaning up took 8 hours with a long lunch break.
     Yesterday I could hardly move (thank you Motrin for helping me as much as you did). I had some wicked insomnia and didn't get to sleep until almost 0200. Wednesday started out with packing up next section of boxes (about 10-15) that were ready to go in the POD and it is looking really good. I am soooo close to being done. SO close. I really do think finishing (except last minute stuff) by Friday is a realistic goal (fingers crossed).
     Yesterday my prayers and optimism towards the next step of my adventure were answered. I no longer have to worry about plan "B" of a commune to live in--just kidding (sorta) or plan "C" a hotel until I could secure adequate temporary housing.
     I have 4 weeks to give me a head start with a friend and her family to find a job and an apartment. After 4 weeks we will reevaluate how it is or isn't working for everyone and how much more time may be needed. Who knows, maybe I will land a job quick-o fast-o and not even make it to the 4 week check in. That would be my vote :)
     The "Done" List
(1) "Lilly pad" to land on arrival in SF (initial housing secured)
(2) Shed 100% done
(3) Bathroom 100% done (did that Wednesday)
(4) Worked on more of the Kitchen
(5) Office 100% done
     The "To Do" List
(1) FINISH by Friday with packing
(2) Finish taxes by next Wednesday
(3) Wash truck (I know I feel the same way. This will NEVER make it off the list LOL)
(4) Take truck in for last of repairs needed
(5) Make "loose ends" list (what can I say--I'm a list girl!)
    Hope you are all great and thanks for keeping up with me on this. I truly feel indebted to you all for your interest and support in my adventure. It means more than I can express. Thank you with all my heart.

Tootles :)
Heather